A lone Cheeto sits on my floor, forlorn.

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  1. hari
    Posted March 24, 2007 at 3:39 pm | Permalink

    throw a pretzel on the floor to keep it company.

  2. Marcia
    Posted March 24, 2007 at 6:13 pm | Permalink

    I have a whole bag of Cheetos on the counter. Perhaps you should mail me your one that is so forlorn, so it won’t feel lonely anymore.

  3. Anonymous
    Posted March 25, 2007 at 1:41 am | Permalink

    Are unclean floors and liling plates in the sink considered chic after a certain age? (ie college)

    The Recipe:

    In a large saucepan, bring 3 cups of water and 3 cloves of garlic (cut in half) to a boil. Turn off the heat when the water boils, and add 1/2 cup of honey and 1/2 cup of fresh lemon juice. Strain. Sip 1/2 cup, warm, three times a day. Refrigerate extra to use the next day.

    The Catch:

    This tea can be an anti-aphrodisiac. With garlic as the primary ingredient, your health may improve, but your breath will be intimidating

  4. Geigerin
    Posted March 25, 2007 at 12:05 pm | Permalink

    I’d eat it. Quick! If someone steps on it, there is definitely staining potential.

    PS – Piano Virtuoso Jeremy Denk is performing with the KC Symphony next year and I have a subscription!

  5. Emily
    Posted March 25, 2007 at 1:34 pm | Permalink

    That sounds like the beginning of a great haiku.

  6. Anonymous
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 4:47 am | Permalink

    To this (different) “Anonym” garlic IS an aphrodisiac!!

  7. Jeremy Denk
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 7:56 am | Permalink


    you seem to be closest to discerning the idea … an exercise in concision … to distill think denk into one sentence if possible …


  8. Anonymous
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 10:15 am | Permalink

    haiku? maybe…. but I kinda thought you also had the makings of a pretty decent dirty limerick there…

  9. Anonymous
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 11:36 am | Permalink

    so – did you pickitup???? the suspense is killing me…

  10. ACN
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 2:19 pm | Permalink

    One of your most profound sentences.

    Possibly your most profound post.

  11. Claire
    Posted March 26, 2007 at 4:01 pm | Permalink

    that was so .. PROFOUND!!! 😛 hugs

  12. Emily
    Posted March 27, 2007 at 8:10 pm | Permalink

    Okay, gotcha. Just reassure your fair readers that the wee, lone Cheeto is not an autobiographical metaphor. Otherwise we may have to schedule an intervention.

  13. Samantha G.
    Posted March 27, 2007 at 10:09 pm | Permalink

    A lone Cheeto sits on my floor, forlorn,
    child of dairy byproduct and corn;
    With mustard and french onion dip to adorn?
    Or to smush neath my shoe in cheddar-baked scorn?

  14. Lane Savant
    Posted March 29, 2007 at 10:22 am | Permalink

    Cheetos are so genetically similar that they might as well be clones. This is why they are in such danger of extinction. Also, one ought not eat one while wearing white, the orange coloring stains. If the thing has been on the floor more than 5 seconds, one ought not eat it at all. I recommend a dust buster.

    Foodless Snack in repose.
    Practice, Practice, Practice

  15. jolene
    Posted March 31, 2007 at 12:57 pm | Permalink

    very “faulkner”, as in “my mother is a fish”

  16. Nick Reilingh
    Posted December 10, 2009 at 3:26 pm | Permalink

    There, a lone Cheeto.
    On my floor, forlorn; it sits.
    Five second rule? Yum.

  17. Genevieve Jones
    Posted February 8, 2010 at 8:21 pm | Permalink

    Every Cheeto is different, just like each snowflake is different.

    I saw a lone Cheeto last week, before reading this.

    Cheeto on the floor
    Some one’s H & R Block card
    Ireland’s color scheme

One Trackback

  • By Schubert’s Killer Abs on December 10, 2009 at 12:57 pm

    […] find a letter to testify to my shame. Of all the sinful confessions of Think Denk, ranging from lonely Cheetos to promiscuous metaphors, this is the darkest and deepest. Here […]

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